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I was born before television, penicillin, polio shots, frozen foods, Xerox, contact lenses, Frisbees and the Pill. There weren't things like radar, credit cards, laser beams or ballpoint pens. |
| Man had not invented pantyhose, dishwashers,
clothes dryers, electric blankets, air conditioners and he hadn't walked on the moon. |
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| Your Mom and I got married first then lived together. Every family had a father and a mother, and every kid over 14 had a rifle that his dad taught him how to use and respect. |
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| Until I was 25, I called every man older than me 'sir'; and after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, 'sir.' |
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In our time, closets were for clothes, not for 'coming out'
of. Sunday's were set aside for going to church as a family, helping those in need, and just visiting with your neighbors. |
| We were before gay-rights, computer dating, dual careers, day-care centers, and group therapy. Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment, and common sense. |
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| We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong, and to stand up and take responsibility for your actions. |
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| We thought fast food was what you ate during Lent. Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins. Draft dodgers were people who closed their front doors when the evening breeze started. |
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Serving your country was a privilege, living here was a bigger privilege. |
| And time-sharing meant time the family spent
together in the evenings and weekends-not condominiums. |
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| We never heard of FM radio, tape decks, CD's,
electric typewriters, artificial hearts, word processors, yogurt or guys wearing earrings. |
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We listened to the 'big bands', Jack Benny and the President's speeches on the radio. I don't ever remember any kid blowing his brains out as a result of having listened to Tommy Dorsey. |
| If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan' stamped
on it, it was junk. |
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| The term 'making out' referred to how you did on
your school exam. |
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Pizza's, McDonald's and instant coffee were unheard of. |
| We had 5 and 10-cent stores where you could
actually buy things for 5 and 10cents. |
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| Ice cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel. And if you didn't want to 'splurge,' you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail a letter and two postcards. |
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| You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $600, but who could afford one. Too bad, because gas was 11 cents a gallon. |
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In my day 'grass' was mowed, 'coke' was a cold drink, 'pot' was something your mother cooked in, and 'rock music' was your grandmother's lullaby. |
| 'Aids' were helpers in the Principal's office, a 'chip' meant a piece of wood, 'hardware' was found in a hardware store and software wasn't even a word. |
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| We were not before the difference between the sexes was discovered, but we were surely before the sex change and 'Billy' has two mommies. |
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| And we were the last generation that was so dumb
as to think you needed a husband to have a baby. |
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No wonder people today call us
old and confused, and |
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